Sunday, February 06, 2011

the turning away

whew. the surgeries are over, and little miss siesta came through everything fine. unfortunately, the thing i dreaded most is that she would change her personality. i'm still hopeful, but she has not exactly turned back to me with joy. she's the kind of cat who gets VERY stressed by changes in her day. she loses her confidence, and shrinks into a scaredy cat really fast.

i wonder if she knows how much i have hurt for her in this, and prayed about her, and pleaded for good things to get her through this ordeal.

i wonder if she knows i have done the right things, and that everything was done for her well-being.

i wonder if she knows that my heart hurts when she loses trust, and runs and hides when i come to find her.

i wonder if she knows that i would give nearly everything for her affection, because she belongs to me. that i won't give up. that i long to have her come back to me, and not choose to stay distant.

nope. she doesn't know (she is a cat, after all :)). I KNOW that with time, i will regain her trust and regain her love. i'm sure of that.

but it did cause me to see a picture of how God must feel when we react in the very same way when painful things happen to US. surely, we know that He longs for us, and that we will both be the better for it if we just GO and be with Him. i am sorry, Lord, for my turning away sometimes.


Ellen said...

I needed this gentle reminder, Bobbi. I am totally like your cat!! I struggle with holding God responsible for my pain rather than turning to Him in the midst of it. Thanks for drawing the parallel.

See, this blog isn't all about aesthetic pleasure and comfort... :)

bobbione8y said...

hi ellen - yep, God often uses my pets as analogies...i guess He uses what we know :)

how are you, friend? are you ready for summertime yet? of course, it's probably absolutely BALMY in sioux city :))

Karen said...

Wow. I was preparing words of comfort and encouragement...and then you gave them to ME.