quiet Monday

today was abnormally quiet on the back forty. couple of reasons.

#1 - the 'slowdown' of work is here again, and the phone/email have been silent. sigh. wish it was not so, but i am trying to find a bit of work, and realize that september is a gorgeous month to have 'off'

#2 - today, my 93 year old next door neighbor moved to an assisted living center. she never ever made even a PEEP of sound, but somehow, it's quieter without her here. she has lived on my block since 1950.

#3 - my head is really in the clouds. this past week, i made the trek 'home' several times for my dad, who had hip replacement surgery a week ago. on the way home, sometimes i take the back roads instead of the interstate, because it's a little more scenic and peaceful.

i miss my family. i miss that i lived most of my life far enough away from them that i don't see them that often. last night as i drove home, i wondered how it would have been different if i had stayed in brookings, closer to home. would i visit more often? would i still have strayed away? i know some people who talk to their parents every day! even from far away!

sigh. i have cried alot in this past week, thinking and pondering and wondering 'what if'...but you know what? it is good that i want to have more time with them, that this is just becoming not enough anymore. maybe it means i am finally appreciating what i have always had.

happy monday, all.